Frets about Strange Instruments


Reprinted from Songworm 3

Parody of “Thoughts on Strange Visitors”, words and music by Leslie Fish

For more information and other parodies, see www.songworm.com
Parody lyrics ©1989-09-08 by Bob Kanefsky. All rights reserved. The copyright of the original lyrics and music remain with the holder(s) of the original copyright.

What Am
inst
ruments can these C
be
, so small and Am
plain
?
These C
pla
stic things of half a pound
Can G
ri
val in their haunting sound
The F
wood
en harp I lug around.
It G
goes 
aEm
gainst 
the Am
grain
.

What instruments can these be?  They seem immune:
Not strung with any strings to break,
Not bound with any pegs to shake,
Not covered with a skin to flake,
And never out of tune.

What instruments can these be?  They can’t be real.
The notes emerge so sweet and pure,
Chameleon-like, with such allure
That organ, drum, and dulcimer
Could sue for look-and-feel.

What instruments can these be, beyond compare,
That novices can play with such
A comf’rtable and feather touch
Their hands don’t even bleed too much?
It seems a bit unfair.

What instruments can these be?  I am undone.
The digitizing circuit sings
Like goatskin drums and catgut strings.
I wish I’d never seen the things!
And I must get me one.
And E
must get me Am
one
.